DECISION decision...

heyyo,

i just need to jump here for a lil while,
when im stressed or have a lot on my mind, i just need to write,

these past few months had been quite stressful for me,
grown ups thinggy,
and I think, I have had enough, I just want it all to stop. once and for all.

leave all these stressful situation, and run back to my home, to my parent to find some comfort.

trust me. i want to do that still. like RIGHT NOW.

But. yes. Theres always a but. and the biggest but is.....

BUT, I am and adult.
maybe its time for me to deal and face all these grown up thinggy,
I cannot run back home crying to my parent every single time an inconvenience occur in my life,
I'm a grown up, right?

I have to face all these, its your life now Maryam, you're not a child,
yes, i have to face all these as an adult, you maryam cannot run away from problems forever,
face it,
it doesn't means you have to tolerate all the bad things thrown at you,
but, take it with grace, as a lesson, as a reminder, as a self reflect,
maybe, just maybe stop thinking you are the only victim, im sorry, my pisces jumps out hahah
maybe, its my fault too, im human after all, i really am sorry

I have to accept that as an adult, every decision that i make have some consequences,
I too have dreams and things I wanted to achieve in life, 
soooo SUCK. IT. UP. lets do this!! we gonna get thesee breadsssssssss!!!!!!!!!!
hahahhah okay

and remember you always can escape all these, but not by running, but by embracing it and do better,
theres always option,

after all, every cloud has a silver lining,

i wanted to share this page from the book ive been reading now,
a very good reminder to all of us,
life is but a perspective, its now how people treat you that defines your life,
its you, how you see it, if your looking it through a smudged grimy lens, then everything will looks filthy and tarnished,
but if maybe, you just wipe your dirty dusty lens, lifes not that bad after all ;)

 

cheers to being a responsible grown up human being ;p